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HAMILTON, Ontario — A sales receipt for a single half-quarter of Jenna Von oil from the newly opened Rule of Trees dispensary measures nearly the length of a pack’s worth of rolling papers laid end to end, according to a Weedmaps review left by customer Wright Veriwell. 

“Their selection is top-notch and the staff are second to none; the strain I was recommended deserves a review so long I could almost write it all on the fucking five foot long receipt I got with it,” read Veriwell’s 1258th review on the site. “Since we’re already wasting paper, I figured I would use the free pack of rollies they kindly threw in to measure the exact length of this one-item bill of sale on a scale we all recognize. I’ve also posted a photo of it next to a banana on Reddit, and next to something else on DeviantArt. Is it ironic that I’m reminded of a drugstore?”

Rule of Trees manager Adam Yachts immediately replied to the Weedmaps review, clarifying that the receipts themselves are “100% raw hemp cigarette grade paper with adhesive strip and slow burning technology.” 

Kyle Stanley will try anything to get free shit. @KGordonStanley on Twitter.

Disclaimer: This Article Is a Joke

Speaking of absurdity, did you know there are still over 40,000 people locked up on nonviolent cannabis-related charges around the US? It’s time to let them out.

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