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FORT WORTH, Texas — Fort Worth police officer Angus Reid made an arrest this morning after allegedly smelling a single joint in a glove box nearly 700 miles away.
“In the normal course of duty, I happened to catch a whiff of the reefer from outside the car,” said Reid, referring to this morning’s bust involving a 2006 Toyota Camry with Texas plates in Decatur, Alabama. “That gave me probable cause to take a look inside the vehicle.”
“After detecting the illicit substance, Officer Reid put himself directly in harm’s way, driving over 10 hours to apprehend the suspect in a Wendy’s parking lot at approximately 1:23 a.m.,” said Lt. Harold Kirkland, honoring Reid with a commendation from the Texas DPS for going above and beyond the call of duty. “If all our local police had his bravery, the state of Texas would be a much safer place.”
While Reid’s superhuman smell remains unexplained, medical experts have seen similar cases within the law enforcement community.
“Cops tend to have enlarged olfactory nerves, giving them roughly 1,000 times the average sense of smell. There are anecdotal reports of officers who can sense marijuana in a bedroom dresser drawer from inside their squad car while on the way to the offender’s house,” said Dr. Cecil Gersh, professor of rhinology at the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine. “More research is needed.”
Reid was honored alongside a fellow officer from Amarillo, who somehow managed to spot a gun on a suspect who didn’t even have one.
Andy Holt is an editor at Hard Drive magazine.
Disclaimer: This Article Is a Joke
Speaking of absurdity, did you know there are still over 40,000 people locked up on nonviolent cannabis-related charges around the US? It’s time to let them out.