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LOS ANGELES — CBS sitcom Family Startup has announced the neighbor character will be a stoner and therefore will wear stoner clothes, eat stoner food, and say and do stoner things.
“He’s gonna use the surfer-ish accent and forget what he’s saying mid-sentence, and play video games and eat junk food all the time,” stated showrunner Janet Margaret. “And in season 2 when we see his bedroom it’s gonna be basically wallpapered with Sublime and Dead posters.”
Producers of the show have added the character will probably live with his parents and have a grow operation in the house.
“He’s also going to have all kinds of silly paraphernalia like huge bongs that aren’t even usable,” producer Mark Steton commented. “And he’s probably always talking about Phish or something. We’re still fleshing things out a little.”
Though the show is just starting, there is already talk of having the mom character need cannabis for something in season 3 and have to ask the stoner character for help, sending them on a zany quest together to get weed.
Cameron Foley is a comedian and writer. He’d prefer you call him Cam.
Disclaimer: This Article Is a Joke
Speaking of absurdity, did you know there are still over 40,000 people locked up on nonviolent cannabis-related charges around the US? It’s time to let them out.